Funny Family Guy Quotes

• Lois Griffin: I guarantee you a man made that commercial. Peter Griffin: Of course a man made it. It's a commercial Lois, not a delicious thanksgiving dinner.

Olivia: You are the weakest link, goodbye. (laughter) Stewie Griffin: Ha ha ha! Oh gosh that's funny! That's really funny! Do you write your own material? Do you? Because that is so fresh..

Peter: Brian, there's a message in my Alphabets. It says "oooo." Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.

Lois: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different. Stewie Griffin Quotes: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankles behind your ears that would ring a few bells.

Peter: "Look Lois, the two symbols of the Republican Party: an elephant, and a big fat white guy."

Peter Griffin: "Oh man, this is even more intense than the time I forgot how to sit down."

(Meg walks into the dining room with her new lesbian look).
Chris: Mom, why is the cable guy here?

Peter Griffin: Son, this is a big day for you. Today, you become the man of the house, because, when we get home, your mother is going to kill me.

You better watch who your calling a child louis, because if I'm a child you know what that makes you? A Paedophile, and I'll be damned if I'm going to stand here and be lectured by a pervert

Damn the toilet! It's made slaves of you all! It just sits there consuming other people's feces while contributing nothing of its own to society.

You're the worst thing to happen to musical theater since Andrew Lloyd Webber!

Lois Griffin: Peter! You're bribing your daughter with a car?
Peter Griffin: Ah, c'mon, Lois, isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?

Family Guy has been entertaining the American public for several years, but has only been on terrestrial TV in the UK since October 2005.  Family Guy bears a superficial resemblance to The Simpsons, in having a similar family structure. But, with a much harder edge, the feel is more like South Park. The themes are much more adult, in every sense, and all the characters indulge in clever repartee (even the ones that shouldn't be able to talk).

The main characters in Family Guy are Peter Griffin the dumb father, Lois his sensible wife, baby Stewie the brat, and Brian the too-clever dog. Peter Griffin is similar to Homer Simpson, but comes off as less dumb but more warped. Lois Griffin is a bit like Marge Simpson, but comes from a much rougher area of town.

Stewie Griffin is almost the exact opposite of Maggie Simpson. Where Maggie never talks, Stewie talks all the time. What makes Stewie the star of the show is not just that he talks, but that he talks like a gay, sophisticated, British stage actor with an anger problem. Brian is also a sophisticate (sophistidog?), think Snoopy rather than Santa's Little Helper. Unlike these dumb canines, he's a talker.